Blog

By the time May 2022 rolled around, Marquita Crouch was consumed by grief. In an eight-month span, Marquita – an agent with the Customer Support Contact Center – had lost her stepmother, father and brother. She says their deaths just about sucked the life out of her. She was barely making it through the day when her former supervisor told her about a group that Marquita now credits with saving her: The Loss Circle.  

“When I went to the first meeting, I cried. I cried my eyes out,” she said. “I was able to hear other people from so many different departments and different states who were going through similar situations. I had a place where I felt like I had a voice again.” 

As she emerges from that intense sorrow, what strikes Marquita is that her journey is happening at work. When she heard about The Loss Circle, Marquita assumed it was a support group outside of work. She had no idea that RBS had this group – developed organically by RBS associates – to help confront her type of pain.  

“It completely surprised me because I've never known any job to really care that much,” she said. “A lot of jobs will always point you in the direction of an Employee Assistance Program (EAP), but EAP has not given as much as The Loss Circle has given to me.” 

A Safe Space
Part of the BALANCE + Allies BRG, The Loss Circle is a monthly gathering for associates who are grieving. Whether a pet, relationship or person – the group is there to create a safe space for associates to openly feel and speak their pain.  

“I lost my son a little over a year ago and I feel like I go through it every day,” said Connie Lebo, Manager of the Indirect Center of Excellence Vendor Management and Analysis team and a lead for the Loss Circle. Connie remembers attending a Balance BRG meeting and suddenly crying and telling the story of her son, Erik, who died from fentanyl poisoning. Other members spoke of their losses.  

“I realized there are so many people in our company that are hurting and just need somebody to talk to and share their raw emotions,” Connie said. “Somebody brought up ‘what about a loss circle?’”  

The group met for the first time in February. With 18 members on the list, there are times when as few as four people assemble. For Connie, it’s not about the numbers but the availability of others to create an emotional oasis for colleagues.  

Most members have private therapists with whom they meet outside of work, but grief isn’t limited to a specific time or day. Connie says The Loss Circle’s priority is to provide support for associates while at work. They intentionally meet at the end of the day. 

“Because most of the time we end up crying,” Connie said. “And who wants to cry and then go into a meeting right after?”  

“We have it at the end of the day and people just share and there are people that really need to let their emotions out and talk to somebody who can truly understand what they're going through and what they're feeling and how.” 

"No Judgment"
Marquita calls it “a place of no judgment” where she says she listens and heals from the encouragement others give her.   

“I felt I lost a huge part of myself before, but I'm watching myself come back,” she reflected. “The Loss Circle is the family that I needed especially when I lost a huge part of my current family. I was being so strong for everybody else in my family, but I never took the time to grieve anyone until I came there.” 

What started eight months ago as time set aside to just talk has morphed into deep discussions about podcasts and books about grief. The upcoming Oct. 27 meeting will feature a counselor as a special guest speaker.  

For Connie, it makes sense to have this type of gathering at work.  

“When you see people who you work with every day are a part of this really raw and vulnerable group, it changes your perspective and opens your eyes to understanding people and being more empathetic and compassionate during our day because I don't know what you're mourning.” 

As far as the BRG is concerned, Director of Communications and BALANCE BRG Chair Erin DeWaters, says she’s incredibly proud of the Circle and its founders, explaining that the Loss Circle is an example of exactly what a BRG is designed to do.  

“This circle is the perfect example of what our BRGs are meant to do – create safe spaces to share and support one and come together as colleagues,” she said.

“I’ll never forget our first meeting as a relaunched BRG when some of these stories were shared. We have amazing colleagues like Connie who ran with it, and the Loss Circle came to life from there. She and other BRG members have been selfless, brave and transparent in sharing their stories and as a result, impactful bonds have formed. This circle is one of the things I am most proud of within our BRG – and within RBS – this year.”